Just nothing
by Madame Vodka
Summary: Quatre: There will be Peace, Heero: Dont cry for me. Wufei: Can you see them Dorothy? Relena:Come and Kill me deathsfic FINALLY FINISHED!
1. The time is right

So what do you think? You can tell me that it sucked if you like just be truthful. Part of the Human rights afterall  
There will be peace. By Sooty - Serenity Aura Crystal Winner  
  
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I am so tired of the endless office reports, the thousands of people emailing me everyday telling me how much they hate me for ruining their lives by killing their families in the last few wars.   
  
They forget the fact that those men chose to go, chose to fight, they should have known they weren't invincible that they might die. They wouldn't even been killed if they had tried to stop a war. Instead of joining an army they could have said no I am going to do something for peace not for power.   
  
I lost my father too. My sister is dead because of me. Does anyone grieve for them? I have no soul left to grieve. I can't apologize to every individual for killing. But still I ask why can't the world apologize to me?   
  
I was just another soldier I don't expect to be treated as a hero because I am not a hero. I was just another soldier trying to fight for what I thought was right. People forget that I suffer too.   
  
I am not just a rich boy sitting in his mansion living an easy life. I have a conscience too. The wars took away my friends my family my childhood my whole life. What has it left me with? Nothing but bloodstained hands.   
  
I feel so numb now. I feel nothing but guilt. I can't live like this anymore I can't take it you may think me selfish you may hate me but this is something I have to do. I was just another soldier doing his duty. There will be peace.  
  
*****  
Quatre stopped writing, sighing to himself softly he picked up his gun. The time was now.   
  
A gunshot rang out throughout the Winner household startling the Winner sisters and servants. Many of them run towards the sound of the gunshot. Quatre's room but they are to too late. Quatre was rushed to hospital and pronounced dead upon arrival. His last writings were read out on his televisions funeral. And so the whole universe weeps for just another soldier who has lost his way in the world. The way in his life. 


	2. Question from Sooty

Does anyone think i should do the pilots reactions for this fic? what they thought and felt to Quatre's death?  
or do you think i should delete this story?  
SootyBabe aka Serenity Aura Crystal Winner 


	3. Don't cry for me

In reply to a note; not all gundam pilots are dead some are just lost in friendship. Hope better understanding now. Am currently also writing a fic bout Quatre's childhood purly made up but hope you guys will read it when it come out [but you dont have to] too lazy to a disclaimer you all know this gundam wing isnt mine...Sorry but one swearword in here   
A day before  
  
Why can't Quatre understand? Why must he consistly blame himself for what happened? it wasn't his fault *sigh* I just can't live without Trowa though, Me the emotionless soldier is actually considering death just because he is missing someone. Trowa, life is full of questions why did you chose Quatre that day? why couldn't you of let him die? why couldn't you of love me instead.   
  
I can't even look at Quatre anymore. Can't bear to be anywhere near him, i know he is hurting too, but that still doesn't make up the fact he is alive whilst you are..deead Trowa whilst you are dead and i want to be with you. No matter how sorry Quatre says he is, it doesnt change the fact i need you..and you are not here.  
  
The heartless bastard! i hate him so much now, i can't stop hating. He has gone home now, back to his mansion, to his comfortable life, his wealth, his loving family and what do i have? he has denied me love. your love Trowa and now i have nothing.   
  
I will live to take my revenge though.  
Four days later.  
  
I sat laughing at Quatre's funeral. how annoyed he must of been to see all those false mourners Trowa, your funeral only had us four, three after Duo screamed at Quatre to leave. Quatre has hundreds of mourners but none will miss him.  
  
It is strange though, those words he wrote. "I was just another soldier. There will be peace." Trowa what did he mean? there will be peace this is not peace this is hell what i am living in.   
  
I am just another soldier too Trowa, staring at my gun realising i have driven someone to death with just words. I can't get rid of this anger and guilt inside of me. I wasn't taught how to convey my feelings to people. as far as i was concerned i didn't have any feelings. So why must i feel this guilt? and .. sadness. I should of never said that too Quatre, it was that fucking Zero system. The cause of all my problems.   
  
I want to say goodbye to everyone who bothers reading this laptop. I can't cope espeacially now cause of Quatre,  
Don't cry for me  
  
Heero Yuy 


	4. Its not Fair

Thanks to anyone who has reviews. Big special Sooty thanks to Mists of Avalon and Mistal: Dark Angel of Abyss. I am kind of hoping people are reading this but too lazy to review. I sort all demanding need bad critism to keep going and crap like that. Anyway. Does anyone think I should do Relenas, Dorothys, Unes, Noin, Sally and Zechs p.o.v as well as Wufei and Duo? Sorry but you are not going to get a Trowa reaction. Sorry bout the swearing it part of my evil nature. This is sort turning into a gundam wing love triangle gawaah  
Now you can find out whether Heero actually Died or not. Bye Bye  
Oh wait Disclaimer: me no own me too poor leave review if you want more hahahaa  
  
I hate that bastard but yet I love him so much. How could he do this to me? Can't he see I need him? The uptight antisocial git.   
  
If you are really up there God please let him live. He is too young to die. To young to be lying on that hospital bed unconsciously wasting away. It's not fair!   
  
I read what you wrote Heero, you are really screwed in the head. Trowa is dead and yet you keep talking to him as if he was alive. I never knew you even liked him, the silent clown.   
  
Now Quatre is dead too, He was a great buddy, I never should have said what I said to him. I feel responsible for his death; don't make me feel responsible for yours too. I can't keep doing this. I am Death and I never said that any of you could die yet especially when I need you all the most.   
  
You keep breathing Heero lying on that hospital bed. I never thought that you of all people would mess up a suicide twice. You just had to miss your heart didn't you? The Doctors said that you might still die Heero. Is that what you really want?  
  
I miss Trowa, I miss Quatre even more, and I could have forgiven you whilst you were still alive Quatre. Why couldn't you wait a little longer? What made you really snap?  
  
I won't join you guys though. Even though the best of the Gundam Pilots are now dead or dying. Now the circle of friendship has been broken forever. There are still things I have to do for you guys so you are remember as the great guys you are.   
My heart gives a sudden sharp shock and in my mind I can hear the heart monitor. You are dead too are you Heero? You are leaving me too aren't you?   
  
It doesn't matter anymore. I swear by the beast within me that you all will be remember as the great people you are.   
  
Just why couldn't you stay with me? Why did you have to leave so soon?   
  
Why couldn't we off lived normal lives?   
¬Two days later¬  
Wufei, Relena and I were the only people at your funeral Heero, You were born alone and you died alone.   
  
Three graves I have seen in the last two weeks. Three funerals I have stood though knowing that you are all at peace. But why I can't I cry for any of you? Why must my heart be made of stone as I stand feeling that the world as I know it has been tore away and will never be repaired.  
  
Whats on your mind Wufei? You look like you are thinking. Why does the look on your face send shivers down my spine? Please don't let the next funeral I attend be yours. Please?  
  
Please doesn't work though, It didn't stop a crazed lunatic trying to shoot Quatre down; It doesn't stop Trowa from dying.   
  
I begged you not to die Trowa. I can hear me pleading please for you not to die. But you still did. Your last words for Quatre were please. As if you knew what we were all going to do,  
  
It's just so unfair. 


	5. I am not crazy

Thanks for the reviews people. Thank you thank you *gives out bribes and chocolate* thank you thank you. Oh yerah don't be afraid to bad review me I no care I love getting bad reviews Okay here what I am going to do... *drum roll*  
Wufei  
Dorothy   
Relena   
Duo [again]  
Wufei [maybe depends how this chapter goes]  
And then Sally is going to my epilogue   
Teaser not everyone is going to die by suicide, some are going to go crazy before dying and some are just going to be crazy and hey we have a few survivors here. Need someone to pay for therapy and funerals... Morbid aren't I? On with the freak show I mean story.  
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They aren't dead, everyone around me is going crazy, I know they aren't dead you know why? Because I can see them. They are standing over there talking to each other. Can't you see them? Don't look at me as if I were crazy; stop ignoring them you are making them go away.  
  
When Meiran died I lost out on the world I felt like I was going crazy, I know how much it hurts to lose someone but they are not dead. UNDERSTAND? Stop crying you stupid onna and look at them.   
  
I had a dream where I was standing at the grave of Heero, as a funeral went on, everything was so hazy I felt like I couldn't breathe I couldn't say anything I couldn't yell at them to stop couldn't they see? They weren't burying Heero because Heero was standing right next to me laughing that sinister of laugh of his. You should know Duo; you were staring at him throughout the ceremony.   
  
Heero wouldn't do something as dishonourable as shooting himself nether would Quatre, they weren't weak they were strong otherwise they wouldn't of been Gundam pilot. It's unjust that you should think such low things as that.   
  
This is all a dream isn't it though? Trowa is still sipping coffee watching the world. I am still playing chess with Quatre; can't you see the pieces of the game still in play? Its Quatre's turn he just thinking that's all that's why the piece isn't moving. Heero is over there being annoyed by Duo, it still amazes me that he can type at the laptop and talk to Duo at the same time.  
  
I heard someone saying that I was living in my own world right now, they are wrong WRONG understood? I am living in this world you have just all lost it, your imagination has got the better of you because you can't see what I see and I can still see my friends.  
  
I have withdrawn to my room now; I can't break off my training with Katanas just because people have lost it. Stop banging at my door Duo. Leave me alone I am busy. Stop yelling crap about how *it's been over a week* and *I should come out and face the world.* I haven't got anything to face plus it's only been a few hours not a week.   
  
I am not crazy, I am not going to believe your lies about how I should face the fact my three friends are dead because I know you are lying you are just waiting for me to break down and lose myself so you can control me, not again not ever will that happen again I will break down your wall of lies and expose the truth. Trowa, Quatre and Heero are still alive and you know it 


	6. Can you see them Dorothy

Not much to say, People left to do  
Relena   
Duo [again]  
Wufei [maybe]  
And then Sally is going to my epilogue   
erm reviews would be nice but anyway on with the freakshow  
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Quatre. Quatre. Quitter. Killer.....  
Quatre? Winner? The perfect golden child? My savior?   
Why is he dead?  
What it something I never said? Or did?  
Could I of loved you once? I will never know.  
Trowa, Quatre and Heero you were all in my life once.   
Its sad, a woman who can not cry.   
You said I had a good heart. You didn't you all broke so many hearts.  
You have driven Wufei crazy. Literally For a strange reason I felt drawn to the hospital he was in. He was put in a fucking mental hospital because of you guys! How could you be so cruel as to haunt him like this? Like I said, I went to see him today in his white padded room; He recognized me but only said a few words  
"Can you see them Dorothy?"  
It made me want to cry, this once strong and proud young man reduced to nothing because he thinks his friends are still alive. He won't accept the fact that they are dead.  
Those white rooms were peaceful though, it was another world away from you guys, I wanted just to stay there for ever in those calm rooms. But I can't.  
Duo, everyone is worried about Duo, ever since Wufei was taken away to this hospital he has hidden mainly in his room, I hate to think what he might be doing in there. He emerges only to eat and glares at anyone who interrupts him.  
  
Here I stand in this meadow of green, I once stood near here shouting, but now I spin, twirling around and around in the air, I imagine me fencing with you Heero, or am I dancing with you Quatre. Twirl I want to go back in time, Maybe if I twirl fast enough I can go back, go back to the past and face it all. Will you live then?   
  
I have fallen over, tripped on something, Landed on my back. The sky is bright orange tinted with blood red; I sit up and watch the sun set over the ocean. The waves are whispering to me. If only you could see this sunset now Quatre. How it would have made your eyes light up and you would have smiled your smile of angels.   
Now the tears have started I cant stop crying, But watching the sun set and the moon rise, I know that even though nothing will be the same again it will be alright again wont it? 


	7. Come and Kill me Heero

Heero Heero Heero Come and Kill me!  
I am waiting for you on the edge on the cliff. I wore my prettiest dress for you, Do you like it Heero? Heero why wouldn't you answer me? You were supposed to meet me here today you are late Heero you shouldn't be late for me.  
I stood at that cliff for two hours waiting for you, You promised to kill me Heero.  
  
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Relena walks down the Hallway, make up is smeared around her face and the dress she is wearing is several sizes to big, She looks so much like a clown with big red lipstick smeared around her mouth and her pink dress is stained, No one laughs with this clown no one sees her at all no one could stop her.  
Some how she has gotten hold of gasoline and isn't afraid to light a match. After all she needs a bright light to attract her Heero. She believes that he will save her from the fire. Pagan, Dorothy Millardo and Noin are all staying at this mansion watching everyday as she falls apart a little more. Now they have all been locked in their rooms screaming and choking as flames surround. Slowly they all die one by one to the sound of Relena's manic laughing.   
  
Dorothy is desperately thumping at her door, she is the last one alive, flames crack at her skin and she turns and sees Quatre holding his arms out to her, moving towards him she knows everything will be alright now...  
This isn't the end there is still two people left to talk Duo and Sally 


	8. My word is law

Relena what a mental firebug, that's makes her hypocrite doesn't it though? Preaching bout the value of life then torching herself and the unimportant people. Hashanah another couple of graves to dig more flowers to be more services to sit through watch as the people start to lose themselves Quatre what have you started?  
What should the great Shinigami do now? Should he join them? nah to much effort besides I have a plan a great plan which will astound and amaze them all so we will be remember.  
Pity Wufei can't help me, He is just acting you know? he is not really crazy he is just acting so what he killed a couple of admitters with a sedative needle and will spend the rest of his life in the crime insane ward in his nice smart white jacket but its means he can withdrawn from society so he can continuously blame himself that's what he wants he just acting or so I hope.  
I am not going crazy though am not they think I am I can see it in their eyes they fear me whooptdoo that's what they should do fear the reaper because he brings no peace he brings destruction and chaos.  
You will do as I say and I say remember them as they were and my voice is law...  
  
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I though i finished this fic but guess not, any Sally shall make everything clear what duo has been ranting about and such like. Please review 


	9. The Fiery Mourning

It's been along time since I updated this fic. I want to finish it but don't know how.   
  
Anyway this is the last chapter Sally's P.O.V [I want to try and finish before starting a slave Quatre fanfic]  
  
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Sally's P.O.V  
  
May God have mercy on everyone souls.   
  
If the last few months haven't of been devastating enough. Duo has made everyone's life even worse. He has made a living hell. Across the world, within the colonies, everywhere one of the gundam boys would have been remember in any way including the graves and the asylum are all in flames. They have all been destroyed through Duo and his mind.   
  
How can we live now in this war? All the Gundam Pilots are now dead. All because someone killed Trowa, the entire universe has suffered. Thousands have died. The final resting place of the boys we loved so much are lost forever. The souls and bodies of all five pilots are now lost. There is nothing for us to mourn but our memories.   
  
Today The Universe burns its fiery tears in mourning of the five Gundam pilots who have changed it so.  
  
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Not much of an ending huh? But I don't know what else to write so this is the final chapter the ending. Au reviour Adios 


End file.
